In a moment of spectacular irony, I destroyed the dogshaming book.
I figured out how to get peanut butter out of the cabinet, hid the jar in my bed and then ate it sneakily when nobody was paying attention. – Levi
Siri waits until I leave the room to scope the counter for food, her brother snitched on her, and my sight froze her.
We were working on not chewing everything up and she was doing great she had a 5 day streak going on and I thought she was over the chewing stage, until she ate her adoption papers. I had to write the shelter I got her from for new ones they thought it was funny.
Ashton chewed a hole in his new Christmas sweater, then puked it up. Yes, it was as gross as it sounds.
I ate Mum’s glasses while she was in the shower! I’ve had quite a feast on her things this week.
If it’s made of plastic and it’s in reach, it’s Merlins.
“I like eating toys that belong to the small child next door”
“I convince my brother to go outside and then I run back in and eat his supper”
Our 6 month old labradoodle, Rupert, escaped from his kennel and (surprisingly since he is a usually a very very calm puppy) freaked out barking at the front door and trying to get out. He managed to lock the deadbolt (you know, the kind that can only be locked and unlocked from the inside) and lock us out of the apartment.
“Hi, I’m Rupert. I locked my mom and dad out of the apartment while they were at dinner. Some nice firemen had to come break the door down- I got so scared I peed on the carpet. Dad thinks it’s funny, mom is not pleased.”
I tore mom’s cashmere scarf into pieces and shredded an entire roll of poop bags (while they were at the grocery store for 20 minutes)