Your dog did you a favor by eating that book.
You Are What You Eat

Your dog did you a favor by eating that book.
I like to watch myself poop, so I spin around while I go. I step in it EVERY time.
Just try and leave me again.
Harper ate a whole can (1 pound!) of Crisco. We then saw her vomit that entire pound of lard in 2 retches. She’s charming.
I HATE JOGGING SO I MAKE SURE TO HAVE A NICE POOP READY BEFORE WE GET TOO FAR FROM HOME. (MOM WONT RUN HOLDING A BAG OF POO)
My dog had his own fiesta…
I also barked at two executives, tech and the maintenance guy
I ate seven alarm clocks.
I push daddy and daddy out of bed.